Elections in Nicaragua

First of all, if any of you are avid news readers and have caught wind of the current unrest in Nicaragua, I want to assure you that I am totally safe, and there is really no danger of me being not safe even if things continue to escalate.

To the rest of you who are wondering why I would need to make that statement:
We had elections for mayors this past Sunday (mayor is a more important office in this political system), and they haven't gone well. Violence has been escalating, and both sides are accusing the other of foul play. They are doing a re-count today, but the fear is this will actually only cause more violence because the Sanandista party (President Ortega's party) is already sure that they've won, and the opposing PLC says it was rigged from the beginning and they won't accept the recount, so either way the results could cause more violence. Bags of burned PLC ballots were found in the dump in multiple municipalities, but the Sanandistas claim they were planted there, and there has been irregularities in the numbers in several municipalities as well.
As I said, I'm safe, I life on the outskirts of the city, a good ways from any violent activity, and I won't be travelling into the city center any time soon.
But, please pray for our country, and especially this city, Managua. Pray that things will be calmed down soon, and that somehow the truth will come out. My bosses are predicting that it's looking like the only thing that could come out of this is another negotiation between the two "caldeos" (strong men) of the country and leaders of these two parties, likely an underhanded deal which will give more power to these power hungry men. It's a really complicated situation, but it is consistent with the history of political movements in the country dating back to the Colonial era.
I'll let you know if anything else happens.

I went to Guatemala!

Ok, so I actually got back almost two weeks ago. But they have been a busy couple of weeks, so forgive for the delayed picture presentation.

Without further adue - Central American HNGR Interns Vacation 2008

Me, Austin, David, and Sheryl. A diverse and lovely bunch.

The ruins of Tikal! Oh my gosh. So amazing.

We got this lovely riverside bungalow all to ourselves for 2 days. It rained the whole time, but we didn't even mind one bit. Just made a better excuse to sit around reading, doing puzzles, and playing yahtzi!

David and Austin. This is Austin's favorite fruit in Guatemala, mostly because it looks so weird. It tastes pretty good too though.

Here are Sheryl and I at some ruins in Antigua, the beautifully preserved (albiet very touristy) Colonial Capital of Central America.

It was a really nice trip.

Since then I also spent some days with a short term missions team in the Northern part of Nicaragua. It was a good experience. I was a translator (I know right? My Spanish is improving for sure, but they were also a little desprate), and I really enjoyed seeing the rural community we were working in, and the extra acceptance I got from the local Nicaraguans as a translator rather than a member of the team. :-)

Yesterday I tried on my wedding dress and it is just about all finished! It turned out sooo lovely! I wish I could post pictures here... but then Michael would see them, so you'll just have to wait until June 13, 2009, or after when pictures will be posted without hesitation.

I am a feminist.

I own it and I declare it. The mistreatment, the neglect, the opression of women has lasted too long. Too long. The church has not taken a stand. The church has been silent. The church has promoted it rather than healed it. It is wrong.

In Nicaragua 70% of church members are women. Virtually no women are pastors, though ironically in this machismo driven society I have encountered more women pastors than I ever have seen in the states. I have learned there is room for the word "pastora" - "pastor" doesn't have to be only a masculine word. 70% of church members are women, yet women are not in church leadership. Is there something wrong with this picture? Yes.

In Nicaragua infidelity in marraige is the norm rather than the exception. Women have told me this. They have pleaded with me to make their voices known. I have told men. They have told me it's not true. They have told me my sources are emotionally involved and unreliable. This is wrong. I know women who are raped by their husbands. They can't do anything about it. They know that if they left their husband the chances are too strong that they would never find anyone different, anyone better. This is WRONG.

I have sat in meetings where decisions are being made about what we consider a "healthy church." I have seen the parts which speak specifically to women's issues be disregarded and thrown out. The parts I insisted we put in on behalf of those women who pleaded with me to make their voices known. I've sat there silent and helpless as no one took a stand. I was the only female in a roomfull of powerful men.
So this is what it is to not have a voice.

What are we going to do? I am going to start by telling you:
I am a feminist.
Do I love men? Yes. And I believe they should be treated well too.
Do I think women must work outside the home? No. That's not what it means to be a feminist. I plan to be a stay at home mom for a good chunk of my life, if the Lord permits, and I think it's a wonderful and respectable job (as is being a stay at home father).
Do I believe we need to fight for change? Yes. I believe it on behalf of my Nicaraguan sisters. I believe it on behalf of all of the unheard voices - of minority races, of the poor, of the two-thirds world. I believe it when I see that the church is the most exclusionary institution in the United States, when I admit to my pastor here that there is a difference between how women are treated in the church and how they are treated in the rest of society. I am admitting this, not happily reporting it as I should be if the church is really the agent of change it is called to be.
I have sat in a room of powerful men as they made a decision not to hear the voices I have heard. I have cried over this.
I pray: Come Lord Jesus Come.

The rumors are true.

We're engaged!!

I know. I can't believe it either.
Ok, so I know you all want "the story" so here it is:

Friday morning 8:30am I am awakened by something hitting my window screen. I try to ignore it until I hear a soft "Pamela.." I roll over to see Michael smiling at me through the window. "Oh! what are you doing here so early?" I mumble? "I brough you your shampoo" he says (I had just ran out and he had taken my bottle the night before so he could fill it with some of his).
I thought that was sweet of him, so I went around to the door to get it from him, still feeling a little confused as to why he was up and dressed at that hour.
When I went to the hall door (boys can't come into my dorm hallway during normal daytime hours) and there was Michael, with a giant boquet of flowers. "Do you want to go to breakfast?" he asked.
Well I thought that was awfully sweet of him. I noticed his heart was beating when I hugged him "Could this be...?" I thought, but I tried not to jump to any conclusions. So I rushed back to get some real clothes on and brush my teeth, all the while trying not to get my hopes up or assume anything.
We got in the car, but when we didn't head toward our normal breakfast place I was a little curious. "Are we going to Denny's?" I asked... trying to think of any breakfast place near our driving direction. "Um... maybe..." Michael replys. A minute later, we turn off the main road we were on and Michael admits to me, "Ok, so we're not going to breakfast right now." And then I knew. This was really happening.
We drove to Northside Park in veritable silence, both unable to think of anything to say. When we got to the park, Michael asked if I wanted to go for a walk, and I suggested we walk to the bridge that went over the pond a few yards away. He agreed and we both started walking rather briskly in that direction, clutching hands and still unable to think of any topic of conversation. That is until Michael said... "Wow, there sure is a lot of goose poop." Which I agreed with and proceeded to tell of a duck that I heard outside my window. He suggested perhaps it was a goose, but I contended it was in fact a duck. And then... having pulled all we could out of that topic, we walked the remaining distance to the bridge in silence.
When we got to the bridge Michael turned to face me. He told me that he knew this was a place where we had many memories, but they were only good memories here. And so, he told me, this was where he wanted to do it.
And then Michael got down on one knee and asked me to marry him. I said yes. And we both started hugging and laughing. We tried to kiss, but our mouths were too dry, so we just hugged and laughed some more... and the rest... well I suppose it's mostly still ahead of us.

This was my Grandma Schnake's ring. I've known it was some day to be mine since I was little, but in the past few years decided I wanted it to be used when I got engaged. I really don't think I could have found a ring that I liked more if I tried.

Thanks for everyone's support and love! The Lord is so very good to me. I'm really just overwhelmed. I love you all and... sorry if you found out about this from my blog. I tried as hard as I could to tell everyone I could before putting it online... but the clamor for the story finally one out.